How to Create a Good Bedtime Routine for Your Child

Whether you have an infant, toddler, kindergartner, or preteen, a good bedtime routine can be the difference between healthy sleep habits and many restless nights that leads to fatigue in the morning. However, setting up an effective bedtime routine can be easier said than done.

You are not alone if your child has trouble going to (and staying in) bed. However, tried-and-true methods for getting your child to sleep can really help. Here are some practical tips for establishing a healthy bedtime routine and some practices to steer away from to help your child get a good night's sleep.

Setting a Bedtime Routine

A bedtime routine includes everything you do with your baby or child just before you put them to bed, such as taking a bath, the last diaper change, putting on pajamas, and reading a bedtime story.

Research shows that reading a book before bed with your child could enhance their performance in school, and that a solid bedtime routine might even cut down on tantrums and behavioral issues.

The goal of a good bedtime routine is to have consistent set of activities (like brushing teeth and putting on pajamas) that get a child ready for bed—and you want your child to fall asleep independently. This way, if they do wake up later, they should be able to fall back asleep without needing extra help. And a consistent bed time, which could lead to deeper sleep and help kids sleep through the night, might even mean less stress for parents too: One study found that when kids sleep through the night, moms in particular report being in a better mood.

If your child associates falling asleep with being rocked, for example, when they wake up in the middle of the night, they likely won't be able to go back to sleep unless you rock them.

There is no single right way to set up a bedtime routine. Some kids like to hear a bedtime story, others may want to talk about their day, and some may want to say their prayers and go to sleep. But while a bedtime routine will help your child get in bed at the same time consistently, keep in mind that might still take your child some time to fall asleep, and they may still wake up throughout the night.

Bedtime Dos

When developing a bedtime routine, it's important to set the stage for your child to settle down and drift off, ideally on their own. Try these effective techniques as you develop the routine that works best for your child.

Be consistent

Your bedtime routine may change over time, but it should be fairly consistent from day to day starting at the same time and going in the same order. For example, a toddler's bedtime routine might start at 6:30 p.m. and include a bath, putting on pajamas, reading a few bedtime stories, getting in bed, and a final goodnight.

Include dental hygiene

Proper dental hygiene is a good habit to include in your child's bedtime routine each night, whether you are cleaning your baby's gums or reminding your older child to brush and floss.

Keep it short

Keep it simple and fairly short. A good bedtime routine will probably last about 15 minutes to an hour or a little longer if you include a bath, depending on your child's age and how established they are in their routine.

Make it age-appropriate

Your child's bedtime routine will change over time. For example, while it is expected for a bedtime routine for a newborn or younger infant to include nursing or a drinking a bottle of formula, an older child's routine may include a snack.

Offer limited choices

Your child can't decide when to go to bed or how long the routine is, but you can let them have some control over their bedtime routine. For example, let them choose between two pairs of pajamas and select which books to read.

Have them use the bathroom

Remind kids to use the bathroom. This is especially important for younger kids who still have issues with bedwetting. Additionally, some children will use needing to go potty as a stalling technique. Circumvent that delay tactic by making sure they go before they get in bed.

Establish a bedtime routine early

It is much easier to begin a good bedtime routine when your baby is young than to try and change poor sleep routines when you have a toddler or preschooler who still isn't sleeping well. However, adopting an effective bedtime routine that promotes positive sleep habits is never too late.

Prepare for a little crying

Some kids will cry for a few minutes as they settle down for sleep or when they wake up in the middle of the night. This can be okay if they quickly settle down and you are comfortable letting them cry for a few minutes—but its up to you to decide how much crying at bedtime you are willing to tolerate before going back in the room to offer comfort.

Make the room dark

Blackout shades can be helpful for getting your child's bedroom dark enough to promote sleep (especially in the summer when it is still daylight at bedtime). They may also help your child sleep a little longer in the morning. Some toddlers don't to sleep in the dark, so a dim night light is often useful to help them feel safer and more comfortable. Just make sure it is not too bright.

Use a security object

A security object, like a stuffed animal or blanket, can be an important part of a good bedtime routine, but only for children one-year-old and older. These types of items aren't safe for babies to sleep with, as nothing should be in the crib in order to reduce the risks of suffocation and sudden infant death syndrome (SIDS).

Bedtime Don'ts

Just like there are a lot of right ways to have a good bedtime routine, there are also things you should avoid that often make bedtime more challenging for parents and kids alike.

Don't allow stimulating activities before bed

Implement a "power-down hour" and avoid active play or electronics before bed. Especially if your child has trouble falling asleep, it's usually best to stop stimulating activities in particular on screens, such as playing video games, or watching TV, 30 to 60 minutes before bedtime. In fact, extended screen time throughout the day should be monitored closely as it could interrupt sleep: One study round that adolescents who used 6 hours of screen time during the day reported fatigue and poor sleep quality.

Don't think poor sleep habits will just go away

Don't assume that your child will outgrow poor sleep habits. Unfortunately, if nothing is done, many children who have sleep problems as infants and toddlers continue to sleep poorly even once they start school. The sooner you fix your child's poor sleep habits, including starting a good bedtime routine, the better.

Don't create poor sleep associations

Rubbing your child's back until they fall asleep, having music playing, or keeping the TV on can mean your child will need help getting back to sleep if they later wake up. And no, simply keeping the TV or music on all night might still lead to middle of the night wake-ups, even if it helps them fall asleep initially. If your child wakes up, they will still cry out for you and need your help to go back to sleep.

Don't drag it out

Set boundaries and be consistent. If you are not careful, your child will drag out your bedtime routine with repeated calls for drinks, snacks, or to use the bathroom. They may plead for extra stories or songs. Older kids may also suddenly remember homework they need to do. Aim to address these concerns before you begin your routine so that you can stick to your original bedtime.

Don't give them caffeine before bed

Avoid giving kids caffeinated drinks, like soda, especially right before bed (some families might want to avoid them altogether). Remember that caffeine can be a hidden ingredient in other foods, such as coffee-flavored ice cream and chocolate, in addition to soda and tea.